VodkaSolution

You don’t become an alcoholic for a single episode. I get US and EU are very different when it comes to alcohol consumption, but if OP would see alcohol as the only way to manage all of his problems, ok, it’s dangerous, but if he reckon this is a one of a kind solution, it’s just a bad choice

Too hard

Soccer: yellow card for faking injuries (you can easily see players close to death that jumps us and run if no whistle is blown) and for protesting with the referee. Also, microphoned referee so that the whole audience can hear what they say (it will result in LOTS of red cards until respect is shown)

Basketball: intentional foul is two free throws and ball, three in the last 2 minutes

Football: proper helmets